“I Am A Binge Eater, and I’m Afraid To Be Thin”

My biggest challenge is my commitment to staying on the right path and fear of losing the weight. I get down to a certain number and then I panic and eat. I have a fear of being thin.

I also don’t want to be in the condition my mom is in. We are very much alike and she is slowly killing herself with her weight.I have been in counseling and I am a binge eater, I eat a lot when it’s free and not at my house. I have a lot of issues from growing up with my mom and the way we eat.

I have lost 24 since Nov. and I have been up and down 5-10 week to week.

Yes, I am a big challenge!


Dear J-L,

This is a very common fear. Sometimes it just doesn’t "feel right" to be at a different weight than the one you are used to, the one you are familiar with. It becomes a part of you . . . part of your identity.

To change, it can feel like you are losing something. Sometimes you feel vulnerable and scared.
It’s not that you don’t want to be thin — part of you DOES want to be thin (or you wouldn’t be working so hard at it!)

But part of you is scared . . . scared of change, scared of what the change will mean to you.
Some people don’t want the increased attention . . . or the pressure to maintain it . . . or what they *think* the change will mean (such as not ever being able to eat the foods they love).

Something about the change just doesn’t feel right.

It doesn’t feel like "you."

To manage this fear, you have to flush it out as much as possible. Journal about it. Talk to people. Get it out in the open where you can examine it. And get used to the change slowly. Change can be tricky. And anything that makes you feel vulnerable, or exposed or different in any way can have mixed results.

It’s easy to procrastinate to stay feeling safe. And it’s easy to sabotage in order to get back to feeling safe.

SAFETY rules supreme.

So if you find yourself self-sabotaging, take it as an indication that you are feeling scared and make a plan.

Find a place where you can be at peace with the new you.

An excellent resource for this is my chapter on self-sabotage at: http://www.LoseWeightWithEFT.com

With love,


Carol Solomon
Psychologist, Master Certified Coach and Certified EFT Practitioner, Dr. Carol Solomon is one of the world’s leading experts in using Emotional Freedom Techniques to help people lose weight without dieting, stop binge eating, and reduce anxiety and stress. She is the author of 4 Books on Emotional Freedom Techniques, the EFT Tips Newsletter, the Binge Eating Teleseminar and the EFT Weight Loss CD. Carol has a thriving coaching practice and is passionate about helping others succeed.
Carol Solomon
Carol Solomon

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