Carol Solomon, PhD gives important insights regarding a successful Binge Eating case. Afterwards, her client says, “For the first time in my LIFE ” on Monday night, I was given a chocolate at the end of Christmas meal with friends at a restaurant and I put it to my mouth to take a bite (habit – “in my mouth before I thought about it) and it was too sweet and I was too full ” and I held (HELD) the last 2/3rd’s of it in my fingers for over 10 minutes as we were all saying goodbye and I threw it in a bin (THREW IT OUT) on the way to my car!!!”
Gary Craig (Originally published on Emofree.com)
By Carol Solomon, Ph.D.
To a binge eater, having ONE experience where you feel comfortable in your own skin is a success ” throwing away food (because you didn’t want it) is a major breakthrough. A day without binging can feel like a miracle.
I have worked with Carla for 4 sessions. She had a traumatic childhood (an abusive father). She associated food with survival, the only thing she could give herself for comfort. As a child, she promised herself that when she grew up, she could have whatever she wanted, whenever she wanted.
Carla already knew that EFT worked, since she used it to eliminate her need for her asthma inhaler. But she had not been able to stop binge eating. This problem can permeate everything you do. Carla had her life on hold. She wanted to build her business and start a new relationship, but everything felt too risky. The world was not a safe place.
First, we tapped on her belief that she can’t have what she wants, so she substitutes food.
Even though I believe I can’t have what I want, so I settle for food”
Even though I can’t face my life without food ”
Even though I can’t stand feeling empty ” and I need to stuff my feelings”
Then we tapped on her fear of promoting herself, of making mistakes, of the consequences of those mistakes and her fear of being judged.
Even though I’m too scared to promote my business or myself ” it’s not safe”
Even though I’m afraid of being judged ” my father was harsh and critical”
Even though I’m afraid to make mistakes ” because when I make mistakes I get in trouble”
Finally, we tapped on one specific traumatic event, her sense of feeling unsafe in the world and using food to ward off feelings of emptiness.
Even though life just doesn’t feel safe”
Even though I need food to get this safe, anchored feeling”
Even though my mistakes have cost me dearly, I now love and forgive myself.
Even though this event was terrifying and I still feel ashamed ” that was then, and this is now”
Even though I’m still trying to keep myself safe”
Even though this keeps me on an emotional roller coaster”
Even though I still want to eat what I want, I choose to be peacefully in control around food.
Even though I don’t want to be told what to do, I choose to let hunger guide my eating.
Even though I can do what I want, but I think I can’t”
Even though I think life will be bleak and boring and empty without my treats”
Even though I use treats to ward off these empty feelings”
Here is Carla’s letter to me:
Hi there Carol,
Just wanted to update you that I seem to have had a breakthrough with our last session (although elements of earlier sessions now accessible all at the same time)!
Have not binged since Saturday’s call without white knuckling (!!!!!) and I have in fact been having 3 regular (full of real food, but not grotesque quantities – “just regular sized full of variety) meals!!!
For the first time in my LIFE ” on Monday night, I was given a chocolate at the end of Christmas meal with friends at a restaurant and I put it to my mouth to take a bite (habit – “in my mouth before I thought about it) and it was too sweet and I was too full ” and I held (HELD) the last 2/3rd’s of it in my fingers for over 10 minutes as we were all saying goodbye and I threw it in a bin (THREW IT OUT) on the way to my car!!!
I watched all the team at work pig-out on candy-coloured donuts at 9:30 a.m. and couldn’t imagine anything worse so joined them without eating, without feeling like I cared what they thought (and they didn’t!) and I was totally comfortable with it (COMFORTABLE)!
I have re-tapped to Saturday’s recording several times. I have also been tapping on more words around the language you have given me ““that was then, this is now’ (really powerful) – “especially lots of tapping/words coming to me easily around the promise I made to myself that was so strong through my childhood – “my daily survival mantra – “(i.e. that when I grew up I could have whatever, whenever (i.e. food) and so I have really believed to my emotional core that food was the path, and only path, to my happiness.
It has ““clicked’ in me that actually that was then, and was a little muddled, albeit well intentioned and I can still honour my promise just in a way that leads to my happiness by allowing (another word you have given me) to be open to the things I want.
The tapping also seems to have kind of wired me up to comfortably connect with the new thought that salad and fish or salad and steak (SALAD and MEAT and no DESSERT (what is going on??? – ” – “) is actually the path to my happiness. I have always been able to physically feel better eating regular sized meals and easily digestible foods but my emotional drive to eat fast food fast, and lots of it, has always outweighed my physical discomfort every time.
These last few days feel profoundly different to me. My words to you are not sufficient for explaining right now – “but they will do to give you an idea of how I feel so different!
I am nervous it won’t last, so am tapping on that too. But that is the point, I am tapping (not refusing to tap), and allowing myself to buy and prepare food, and to go to bed on time, and do the things that I want to do (rather than assume it is too hard or scary and cop out and eat instead).
Today, I have the energy that comes from not being so fueled only by junk food – “amazing – “so in itself, it is a relief.
It is unbelievably exciting – “because I am not ““trying.’ Today is Thursday, we spoke Saturday and it has sort of just happened. It also feels like I have had a ““click’ in that I have been allowing myself to distract myself from the habit of imagining constantly the calculations for the 40 kilos to come off in just a few weeks so that I magically get thin fast. I am feeling I can focus on just living and for 3 days have had no problem with taking timeout of work or activity to have a proper meal. No Coca Cola in site”
And on and on I could go ”
Much love and appreciation,
Carol’s note: As practitioners, we have this driving need to help people, and it’s easy to forget how much we make a difference in people’s lives and in the world. When I receive letters like this from clients ” I remember ” and I am grateful for EFT and all of the wonderful practitioners who have dedicated their lives to helping others.
Carol Solomon, Ph.D.
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